The million pound banknote

'I'm so grateful! Just to find a human once more who takes an interest in me and what I am doing. After what I've been through here - Lord! I could go down on my knees for it!' He gripped my hand hard, and straightened himself up. He was all right and lively after that as we got ready for the dinner - which didn't come off.

'No; the usual thing happened. This always happens with that horrible and annoying English system - the matter of precedence couldn't be settled, so there was no dinner. Englishmen always eat dinner before they go out to dinner, because they know the risks. But nobody ever warns the stranger, and so he walks placidly into the trap. Of course, nobody was hurt this time, because we had all eaten already. None of us were novices except Hastings, and when Hastings was invited by the Ambassador he was told that out of deference to the English custom there would not be any dinner.

Because it is usual to go through the motions, everybody took a lady and we went down to the dining-room. There the dispute began. The Duke of Shoreditch wanted to sit at the head of the table, saying that he was more important than the Ambassador, but I refused to let him have his way.

Vocabulary:

Come off: Here it means 'go as planned'
Risks: Things that might go wrong
Precedence: Who goes first
Placidly: Calmly and peacefully
Novices: People doing something for the first time
Deference: Giving respect to
Go through the motions:Do something you do not expect to work
Dispute: A disagreement or argument