Page 59

The Pickwick Papers

To fight, or not to fight?

'Not the man!' said Mr Snodgrass.

'Not the man!' said the gentleman with the camp-stool in his hand.

'Certainly not,' replied the little doctor. 'That's not the person who insulted me last night.'

'Very strange!' said the officer.

'Very strange indeed,' said the gentleman with the camp-stool. 'But now that this man is here to fight the duel, maybe Dr Slammer should pretend that this is the person who insulted him last night, and fight him anyway.

He made this suggestion in a very wise and mysterious way. Then he took a large pinch of snuff, and looked importantly around, as if he was an expert in how things like this should be sorted out.

Now Mr Winkle had opened his eyes, and his ears too, when he heard the Doctor call out for the duel to be stopped. He understood now that the Doctor had made some mistake (afterwards he said that he had always known that the Doctor was mistaken) At once he saw that if he hid the real reason why he had come out to fight he could make himself seem brave and fearless. Therefore he stepped forward, and said loudly.

'I am not the person. I know it.'

'Then,' said the man with the camp-stool, 'you have insulted Doctor Slammer, and that is a good reason for immediately carrying on with the duel.'

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